This is my oldest daughter Donna who went a month of silence in January 2019 and did a TEDx talk about her experience during that month. Donna is also a Toast Masters President, and does other talks on growing in your confident to live yourself in this world, as a Child of God in Christ Jesus!!!
What does creativity mean to you?What type of materials do you use in being
creative?Is it paints, pencils, fabric,
crochet or knitting, musical instruments, writing or something else?Needle, threads and fabrics is what I used
for years and did some writing for personal use.My husband uses his voice and guitars, both
acoustical and electric.The point is
there is different was to be creative.My struggle comes in finding the passion within myself to continue being
creative.Love for our chosen creativity
and a passion that drives us must be there.This is what I’ve discovered when I lost complete interest in most
things.
Why did
I lose interest in my chosen creativity in the first place?I’m still not sure.I am wanting to do some research to see why
this happens.Was it my age, and
entering a new phase in life?Was it
something that can normally happen to someone at any stage in life?Was it because I didn’t appreciate my
creative gift and didn’t fan the flames of fire to keep it going?The most important question is how do I get
it back?How do I find a real interest
in something I can create again?Have I
lost it forever?
My
husband and three adult children and their families are all creative
people.I am the one that lost interest
in about anything.Just recently I have
decided to start fighting to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my
life.I want to know where my creative
desires lay.Making lists always
helps.So I’ll start there.
I
enjoy watching TV.I read a small amount
of devotional writings and am wanting to read my Bible more.I have also been trying to write in my blog
and copy them into a notebook as a journal.I love to encourage others in their interests.I also love to pray for those I read about or
hear about in the news.I am an
introvert, but when I am with people I want to try to connect with a person one
on one.
Over the past 4 years or so I have lost my creative inspiration except for a few months I was into Junk Journals. They are almost any type of journal you buy or make. My favorite was cheap notebooks like Composition Notebooks, or making my own with scrap paper and either machine sewing the binding seams or using used cards and also sewing t journals and sews them together.
Today I watched a You Tuber who makes her own and are much more detailed than mine. Her title caught my eye because also liked to buy 'found' materials at the thrift store. Here is her YouTube channel Wandeka From Jamaica. I was inspired enough that I smeared paint on a few pages, and glued in a few things. Trust me, that is saying a lot for me this past couple of years. I even looked at some hand sewing blogs. Another area I gave up completely....but I'm looking at some ideas like sewing some small projects. I can't say I will do it, but I'm looking~ Here are a few of my older pictures of my art: (I'm reminding myself I can create something.)
The quote by TobyMac is so good.First it reminds me of the study I have
started on the book of JOB.I can see
the faith that Job had in whatever happened to him.Job knew that God was ultimately in
control.For any of you that don’t know,
last Fall TobyMac’s oldest son Truett
died unexpectedly. Toby is a Christian singer who sings about the Hope in
Christ, and here was a very difficult experience he and his family have gone
through, yet he has stood firm that God is a good God, and there is still hope
in Christ alone. *******************************************************************************
This blog post is full of Truth and encouragement for anyone experiencing a spiritual battle that seems to want to destroy you! The Bible tells us of these battles and the way out of them. It is well written and worth the read! It is also written by my daughter, and I just wanted to share it with as many people as possible~!
Posted on
Spiritual Oppression
I can’t believe I haven’t seen it before!
Tonight a friend was talking to me about a struggle involving her husband. She said “I don’t even recognize him Donna. This is not like my husband.” I asked her if she had ever heard of rebuking spirits in Jesus name. She had not. I told her to call if she wanted to talk about it.
As she shared what happened today, I listened, then I said “we are so distracted by our skin. We so are distracted by what we can see and hear and feel and taste that we completely forget that this world is so much more spiritual than it is physical. Ephesians says that our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against spiritual forces.”
I may step on some toes in this politically correct society, because it seems ok to say that God is love, but we can’t acknowledge that Satan exists. If God is the same yesterday, today and forever, then wouldn’t it make sense that Satan is too. We focus a lot on God’s love and grace, we focus a lot on man’s sin, but I believe that by not acknowledging Satan, we give him power.
The Bible says that the “fruits of the Spirit” meaning, the proof that one has the Holy Spirit or God’s Spirit in them is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. If those are fruits or evidence of God’s spirit….what are anger, rage, jealousy, deceitfulness, lust, addiction, depression, and selfishness? Perhaps fruits of another spirit?
Scripture clearly says that Satan or the Devil is not only a liar, but the father of lies….so wouldn’t it go to reason that lying is a spirit that comes from Him?
I believe that each of these “acts of the flesh” are spirits that do not come from God. Sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery which is excessive indulgence in sensual pleasures, idolizing, being involved in witchcraft, hating, discord or disagreements between people, jealousy, rage, selfishness, factions or smaller organized groups within a larger group that don’t get along, envy, drunkenness….I think the list could go on for days!
If it is an act, action or attitude that is not of the spirit of God, I believe it is still spiritual. I believe everything is. We are just so distracted by what we can see that we are blind to what’s going on behind the scenes.
Here’s where it really gets scary. Let’s say someone struggles with an addiction. They get rid of that addiction, but do not replace it with God and His truth. According to Luke 11:24-26, that spirit that left them wanders around, then returns finding that the person has swept clean the house and put it in order. He brings back with him seven other spirits more evil then itself. Sound like relapse?
Now, if God is the same, yesterday, today and forever….let’s see what that means.
When Satan tried to tempt Jesus, Jesus Himself quoted scripture. Guess what Satan did? He quoted scripture back. Jesus used the truth in the Bible to stand up against Satan’s lies. If Jesus had to do this, why wouldn’t we?
In Mark 16:17, Jesus tells us that He has given believers the authority to cast out evil spirits in His name. I used to roll my eyes, just a little, when my mom and grandma would talk about casting out spirits. When my marriage was really struggling, my mom and I stood in every room of my house and prayed against all sorts of spirits which I won’t name because it doesn’t matter…the fact is, there were things going on in my home that didn’t belong there and we knew that only Jesus had the power to break the spiritual strongholds that were present.
Here’s where the “I can’t believe I haven’t seen it before comment came from:”
I believe that I have been living under spiritual oppression since I was 11 years old. I know the day it happened. I can tell you the exact day that self-hatred fell over me like a suffocating blanket. I have had moments of freedom from it, glimpses of internal peace, but never for long. I believe that there has been a spirit of self-hatred holding me hostage for almost thirty years.
That self-hatred was at times so deep, and so intense that I literally believed that if I was to kill myself, my family would be better off without me. One of those times, I had a 5 and a 2 year old daughters. I can tell you intellectually that at the time I was doing some pretty incredible things. I was renovating my house, training for a marathon, and helping people left and right. My life held incredible value….but I couldn’t see it. All that I could think was dark thoughts of ending it all and that being to make the world a better place for my husband and kids who I was pretty sure would fare better without me. Do you see how powerful the enemy’s lies are?
I have been mystified by the intensity of the hate I felt for myself, because I have always known that I was loved by God. I have always known that my family unconditionally loved and supported me, and I have had more people try to tell me the good they see in me over the years than I could even begin to tell you.
A good friend who I have spent two day a week with for almost ten years now told me recently that in those almost ten years, I have never accepted a compliment she has given me. She said “I just keep trying to tell you the good I see in you. I recently thought ‘I know she hears me,’ but you never acknowledge what I say.” I asked her what I do instead. She said “sometimes you change the subject. Sometimes it’s like you didn’t hear me and just ignore me, sometimes you argue with me about how my compliment is not true, and sometimes you deflect my compliment by putting yourself down, but you never just say thank you.”
I wondered how many other people I have done that to over the years. I know for sure that my mom, sister and best friends have tried to tell me the good they see in me over the years, but I always chalked that up to them just trying to make me feel better about myself.
On September 4th at Celebrate Recovery, I took a blue 24 hour surrender chip and told God “I’ve tried and others have tried to help me see my value and worth in this world, but I can’t see it. No one can help me and I can’t do it myself. If I am ever going to stop hating myself and start to value myself, it’s gotta come from you. I surrender my low self-worth to you.”
I thought I was making strides. I wrote out about 15 scriptures and read them day after day affirming my value with the truth of God’s word, then like clockwork, a couple weeks before Christmas, that self-loathing foamed back up in me until I was blinded again. I wanted to run away and live in a cave so people didn’t have to live in my presence. I wanted to glue my mouth shut so I could never offend. I wanted to quietly serve and love people from a distance because I felt that to get close to me wasn’t safe. No matter how much I wanted to love people, I was destined to hurt them.
As I was talking to this friend tonight, I was overwhelmed by the realization that this self-hatred was a spiritual oppression and that in Jesus name, I had the power to rebuke the spirit of self-hatred and self-condemnation.
Praise the Lord that He is able to set us FREE from the law of sin and death! God gave me a word to focus on in 2020….Freedom. I wanted to experience freedom from excess stuff, and freedom from all of my self-limiting, self-hating thoughts. A friend asked me what that would look like? How would I know that I had achieved it? I said “I’ll know when I find myself being as loving, kind, gracious and patient with myself as I am with others.” I was always able to give it to everyone in the world but myself.
In the name of Jesus and by the blood He shed on the cross, I rebuke any spirits inmy life that are not from Him. I rebuke the spirit of self-doubt, self-condemnation, and self-hate. I rebuke the lies of the enemy and all his tricks intended to take my focus off of God’s plan for my life.
Heavenly Father, I pray in the name of Jesus that any places in my life which are left empty that were once filled with those lying spirits are filled with you and your truth so that there will be no place for them to return. I praise you for your goodness and faithfulness. I thank you for placing your Holy Spirit in me to reveal your truth. Thank you for patiently waiting for me to apply the truth of your word to my life, and I thank you in advance for the freedom you’re giving me in this very moment.
I pray that you would keep my eyes open to the deceitful ways of the enemy and give me the boldness to call him out and rebuke him when I notice him at work. Thank you, thank you. In Jesus name I pray….Amen.
If you notice any spirit in your life, in your heart or mind, in your spouse or your kids that is not from God, use the power that Jesus gave you through the Holy Spirit to cast those spirits out in Jesus name. If you have questions or want to talk more about it, feel free to reach out. I myself feel like I’m going to bed a little lighter tonight.
My husband Don fixed his broken
recliner tonight.I am very
impressed!Yesterday without moving anything
on the recliner, the foot rest just broke.When it just broke it made this loud popping noise.Today when he finally turned the chair on its
side, he saw that not only had one bolt been broken in two, but one bolt on
each side of the foot rest had broken off.Plus one of the side springs had separated by about 3 inches.For me, this chair would have been shot
completely!But Don fixed it and it
works great now!I am so impressed and
amazed!Where there is a will there is a
way!And besides, Don has some talent!
Happy Birthday to my youngest daughter Joan!!!She was 38 years young yesterday!!!! I love
you Joan Marie!!!
We had a family birthday party yesterday and everyone was
able to come!It was lots of fun, and
the food turned out well.Joan had asked
for a salad with bacon and artichokes, and I added more salad fixings.I also made 2 shepherd pies, one keto with
cauliflower mash and one with mashed potatoes.There were also chips and salsa.
Katiegrace, Gwynnie, Claire and Annie made two chocolate
cakes with white icing and the other with chocolate icing.I think that is so awesome that the girls
wanted to make their mom and aunt Joan her birthday cake!
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Good Morning LORD!What a great way to start the day off with in
prayer and meditation to my dear LORD and Savior!LORD, thank you for a good night’s sleep and
for life today.I prayed LORD for the US
Embassy in Iraq,, Sonja and Patti’s trip to SC today, the massive fires in
Australia, for Prisoners around the world that trust in Your Name as their
Savior, for the spirit of murder over this country and over the world and for
Your Will to be done in my life~
Heavenly Father, I pray for health over Joan’s family and
for Cherish’s stomach ulcers to be healed.LORD, this is Your Day, the Day you have made, and I will rejoice in it
and share your Name whenever I have an opportunity.LORD Jesus, I thank you for all things that
you allow in my life, and ask that you receive all honor and glory in each
situation!
Thank you for a new year,
2020!You are the author of time, and
you give each one of us our allotted life time in which we can come to you with
our hearts, minds, soul and spirit and worship you and lay everything at your
feet!Hallelujah!Amen!
Today I will be
reading in Job.I am
finishing up some Bible notes on Job and then starting to read and asking the
LORD to give me insight by His Holy Spirit into what He wants me to know and
see in the story of Job.I want to know
more about “Do Not Look Back” regarding Job.Thank you Jesus for this Word you gave me.
JOB 1 – Job was a righteous man who was over his household
spiritually.He wanted to protect them
against sinning against God.One day
when the sons of God were presenting themselves before the LORD, Satan was
among them.He had been going through
the earth.The LORD wanted to know if
Satan had noticed Job, an upright man.God gave Satan permission to touch all that Job had except his very
life.Satan did all he could to destroy
Job, but did not touch his life. Job
faced great loss of his family, his servants and all his property and
livestock.Yet in all this Job did not
sin against the LORD or charge the LORD foolishly, but said, “The LORD gives and the LORD takes away.Blessed be the
name of the LORD.”
My thoughts:All I
have does not belong to me belongs to the LORD.Satan cannot do anything against anything I am loaned by God, without
God’s permission.I am to simply
continue to worship the LORD no matter what happens in my life.My life is not my own, but belongs to God,
who gives and takes and will receive all honor and glory for it.I am not to fear what Satan can take from me,
but to simply keep trusting the LORD with all He has given me.My life alone is His to protect.My responsibility is to do the best I can
with all that He has given me, including my family, wealth and property.
JOB 2 – After all that had happened to Job and all the loss he
suffered, there was another gathering of the sons of God who presented
themselves before Him, and Satan came among them to present himself before
God.Yet again, it was the LORD that
asked Satan where he had been, and asked him if he had considered His servant
Job who was a man of integrity and shunned evil.Satan reminded the LORD he couldn’t hurt Job,
but that a man will protect his own skin.So Satan asked for Job’s skin and bones and the LORD said yes, but not
his life.Wow!Satan when straight from the presence of the
LORD to smite Job with boils from his head to his toes.Unimaginable suffering he had planned for
Job, just to prove Job would not keep his integrity toward the LORD.
Job
scraped his sores and sat in an ash pile, and rebuked his wife by saying,
“Shall be receive good from the hand of the LORD and not evil?”Job’s friends from three different countries
communicated with each other upon hearing about Job’s great sufferings they
rent their own garments and lifted their voices and wept for him. They came to
Job and sat with him for 7 days and nights without saying a word.What amazing friends to have.
My Thoughts:How much
of our struggles and trials are actually the LORD allowing us to be tested to
show our faith and bring the LORD glory?The LORD God offered Job as an example of a righteous man that held his
integrity and did not speak evil against God.So when I suffer physically than I must turn that over to the LORD and
trust that He knows all about my suffering and He is watching my response
toward Him.Will I walk by faith and not
speak evil?